Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Randomize
