yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
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