New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Randomize