I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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