seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
I deserve to be covered in dicks
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize