Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
