just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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