dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize
