He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
