she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize
