Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize