The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Randomize
