"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
Randomize
