Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
where are you?
Hypothermia
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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