the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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