Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
