Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Randomize
