And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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