Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
So much Jack, so little girl.
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize