He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
