STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Randomize
