I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Randomize
