what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
