he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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