why didn't you poke me back
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Randomize