If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Duck Duck Cougar?
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
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