He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize
