THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
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