Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Randomize