Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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