Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
