this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize