I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize