currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Randomize