How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Randomize