Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
Randomize
