Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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