the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Randomize
