i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
