This is not my ceiling
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
i think im in europe. pls send help
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
