you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
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