Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
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