so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
