I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Randomize
