Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
