also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
