i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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