i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
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