Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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