We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
the night ended with taco bell and tears
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
