just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
Randomize
