his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Randomize
