so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
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